Mastering “Show, Don’t Tell” in Writing
The advice to “show, don’t tell” is a cornerstone of great storytelling. It encourages writers to create vivid, immersive scenes where readers can experience the story for themselves, rather than passively receiving information through exposition. This technique brings characters, emotions, and actions to life, making the narrative more engaging and impactful.
1. What Does “Show, Don’t Tell” Mean?
- Telling: The author explains what’s happening or how a character feels.
- Example: “She was angry.”
- Showing: The author uses actions, dialogue, and sensory details to reveal emotions or events.
- Example: “Her face flushed red, and she slammed the book onto the table. ‘I can’t believe you did that!’ she shouted.”
2. Why “Show, Don’t Tell” Matters
- Engagement: Showing pulls readers into the story, allowing them to experience it firsthand.
- Emotional Impact: Readers connect more deeply with characters when emotions and actions are demonstrated.
- Pacing and Immersion: Showing creates dynamic scenes that feel real and immediate, keeping readers hooked.
3. How to Show Instead of Tell
A. Use Action
Describe what characters are doing rather than stating how they feel.
- Tell: “He was nervous.”
- Show: “His hands trembled as he adjusted his tie for the third time. Beads of sweat gathered at his temple.”
B. Rely on Dialogue
Let characters reveal their emotions or intentions through their words and tone.
- Tell: “She was surprised by the news.”
- Show: “‘Wait, what?’ she stammered, nearly dropping her coffee cup.”
C. Include Sensory Details
Incorporate what characters see, hear, feel, smell, or taste to bring scenes to life.
- Tell: “The room was eerie.”
- Show: “The floorboards creaked underfoot, and a faint, musty odor lingered in the air. Shadows stretched across the walls, flickering with the dim light of the single candle.”
D. Use Body Language
Show emotions through physical reactions or gestures.
- Tell: “He was angry.”
- Show: “His fists clenched, and his jaw tightened as he glared at her.”
E. Create Subtext
Let meaning emerge indirectly, encouraging readers to read between the lines.
- Tell: “He didn’t trust her.”
- Show: “He hesitated before shaking her hand, his eyes scanning her face as if searching for a hidden agenda.”
4. When to Tell Instead of Show
While showing is often preferred, there are times when telling is more efficient:
- For Transitions: Quickly convey necessary information to move the story forward.
- Example: “Three days passed without a word from him.”
- For Background Information: Provide context or backstory that doesn’t need to be dramatized.
- Example: “She grew up in a small town, dreaming of city life.”
- To Maintain Pacing: Use telling sparingly when showing would slow down the story unnecessarily.
5. Common Mistakes to Avoid
A. Overloading with Details:
- Problem: Showing too much can overwhelm or bore readers.
- Solution: Balance showing with concise storytelling. Focus on key moments.
B. Overusing Adverbs and Adjectives:
- Problem: Adverbs like “angrily” or “sadly” often tell instead of show.
- Solution: Replace them with vivid actions or descriptions.
- Tell: “She said angrily.”
- Show: “She snapped, her voice rising like a whip.”
C. Forgetting the Reader’s Imagination:
- Problem: Over-explaining can rob readers of the chance to interpret.
- Solution: Give just enough detail to guide their imagination.
6. Examples of “Show, Don’t Tell” in Practice
Example 1: Emotion
- Tell: “He was terrified.”
- Show: “His breath came in short, ragged gasps. His heart pounded so loudly, he thought it might burst. He pressed himself against the wall, his eyes darting to every shadow.”
Example 2: Setting
- Tell: “The garden was beautiful.”
- Show: “Clusters of vibrant roses spilled over the stone pathway, their petals glistening with dew. Butterflies flitted from bloom to bloom, and the air was heavy with the scent of lavender.”
Example 3: Characterization
- Tell: “She was shy.”
- Show: “She hovered near the doorway, her fingers twisting the hem of her sweater. When someone glanced her way, she ducked her head and pretended to study the floor.”
7. Exercises to Practice “Show, Don’t Tell”
- Emotion Description: Write a scene where a character feels an emotion (e.g., fear, joy, anger) without explicitly naming it.
- Setting the Scene: Describe a location using sensory details, avoiding vague statements like “it was beautiful” or “it was scary.”
- Dialogue Subtext: Write a conversation where the true meaning lies beneath the surface of what’s being said.
8. Why “Show, Don’t Tell” Enhances Your Writing
By showing rather than telling, you:
- Engage readers in the moment.
- Encourage emotional and intellectual connection.
- Craft a story that feels vivid, dynamic, and memorable.
Mastering this technique will elevate your storytelling, immersing readers in a world they can see, feel, and experience for themselves.